Bref, Miss Catastrophe Biked to D.C.

Miss C logoAbout Miss Catastrophe:
Someone- probably tired of hearing them- thought my mishaps were worth spreading… Inspired by Kyan Khojandi’s shortcom “Bref”, in this column, I, a.k.a Miss Catastrophe, narrate some of my daily adventures worth sharing, for a laugh, a lesson or both, in less than 500 words. So here you are, as long as you don’t correlate them to karma or to my intellect, you can proceed.

A beautiful Saturday, after cleaning the house[1], I decide to go meet some friends in Georgetown. Due to my self-imposed no-driving rule on weekends, I decide to take the bus. I rush out, I am hungry -as always- and decide to grab for a smoothie to sip on during the bus ride. The bus does not show up – or maybe I missed it. Not to perpetuate the veracity of the Arab punctuality syndrome, I decide to go for a plan B. After all I am a super flexible chick. Right. I see the Capital Bikeshare and decide to rent one.

Stop number 1: the brakes are not the best in class. I learn that the hard way. I will skip the details not to alter my sophisticated image.

Stop number 2: my expensive rose velvety protein smoothie falls in the middle of the street. I park the bike and play the well-mannered young lady and clean my mess. At that point, I was like should have just cabbed it to G-town, you cheap-biker.

Stop number 3, while I was making a protected left turn, a shiny night blue Porsche Boxter decides to cut me off. By respect to the vehicle[2] I control my about-to be-angry-happy-self and slow down. At that very moment, another car, parked on my new right, almost hit me as the driver was opening the door right when I was passing through. A close call that would have been featured on video gag had I arrived two seconds later.

Eventually, I make it to my meeting point, tell my friends to wait as I go check the bike back in. To my surprise… or… not, there was no available spot for my bike[3]. Here I am, after I made it within the thirty minutes allowed (to avoid extra charges of course) and I can’t find a single free spot!

Bref, I biked to DC

[1] Really just a tiny 800-sqft-bedroom, but it would discount my accomplishment so I will hereby continue to refer to my place as my “house”
[2] I have something for German cars that prevents me from getting mad at their drivers no matter how dumb
[3] As a city biker in Texas and in DC now, I have never been exposed to a full station on a beautiful biking-friendly day or ever for that matter…

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